Sex: The American Top Idol

SEX: The American Top Idol

We live in a sex crazed culture where sex can sell just about anything from beer to car insurance. Today sex is nothing more than one of the many desires Americans satisfy without much thought like our appetite for food. When we are hungry, we eat, if the urge to have sex arises, look for the closest friend and benefit! The truth of the matter is that sex has escaped its residence in marriage and been placed on a pedestal for all to idolize. As brief as it might be, appeasing the sex idol emotionally satisfies, security, one of the deepest human needs. The sex idol is both unconsciously and consciously worshiped by millions of Americans daily via Internet sites, movies, magazines and TV shows. Promiscuous living is promoted, at the expense of martial fidelity, as part of the American dream. In order to tear down the sex idol, the original purpose of sex must be resurrected and the Biblical precedence for marriage must be re -instituted.

Marriage is more than sex!
The resurrection of God’s plan for sex will raise the marital climate in America. Sex is just one cylinder in an eight cylinder marriage. God created sex for a purpose and designed marriage as the one and only relationship that purpose is to be experienced so that the marriage relationship can be a reflection of the relationship between the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit to the world. The uniting of married couples in the sanctity of the marriage bed mirrors the unity the Godhead. What if sex in marriage was more about God than about an orgasm? The words sex and God are almost never used in the same sentence, but have multiple intersecting points. Mainly, oneness, which is the idea of multiple units operating in harmony regardless of their distinct differences. Sex is an intersecting point married couples must experience oneness or sexual frustration and dysfunction will breed division.

Marriage will make couples holy before it will make them happy. When the goal of marriage is not sexual euphoria, like Soap Operas, romantic novels and movies promote, but maturity, marriages will go the distance. The goal of marriage is not to please yourself or your spouse, but to please God. A couple’s marital climate directly correlates with their spiritual climate. That is why, the apostle Peter says, “Husbands . . . be considerate as you live with your wives . . . so that nothing will hinder your prayers.” Sometimes the most spiritual thing to do is have a good marriage and in doing so both partners will feel secure.

Marriage is a kingdom partnership, not a combination of one night stands. Couples who have a kingdom purpose interwoven in their marriage understand that their marriage stands for something more than sexual intimacy. A marriage couple whose goal is to partner with Jesus’ Church and his apprentices on earth understand King Solomon who said, “Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” Solomon knew that a team dynamic with God in the center can do more than a one man show. If God is reflected in marriages, then marriages will reflect God to the world. Marriage couples have an opportunity to be a conduit of the love of God to an unloved, insecure world.

Sex is more than marriage!
When marriage is more than sex, then sex is more than marriage, not vice versa. The re-instituting of God’s design for marriage will lower the promiscuity climate in America. Sex with a purpose is the best sex. Sex to satisfy just to satisfy an urge misses the mark of the poetry of sex. Sex activates the marriage covenant, but does not determine marital longevity. A home run does not have to be hit everyday to have sex. The reality is most marriages strike out more than they get on base, but the need of security is still met. If couples are going to feel continually secure in themselves and their marriages, then sex must not be like a trend that fads away, but an ongoing game. Even though sex is just one component of sexual intimacy, it is probably one of the most important. Sex is the only thing you can do with your spouse; you cannot do with someone else. Once sex is taken off the pedestal, it becomes one of the many venues couples experience marital intimacy.

Sex renews the marriage covenant. Just as Christ followers participate in the sacrament, Holy Communion, as a time to reflect and renew the covenant Jesus’ death instituted, married couples renew their covenant when they participate in the act of marriage. Sex is sacred. It unites couples spiritually. Soul ties are either strengthened or weakened by a couples sex life or lack there of. Sometimes the most spiritual thing to do with your spouse is to have sex. Sexual intimacy is marriage is the highway all other areas of intimacy travel on. Although sex is not an end in marriage, it is a non-negotiable means to an end.

Sex leaves a legacy. The whole world is watching marriage couples. They are just waiting to hear about the latest affair. What effects does each affair and divorce have on the generation to follow? Each generation that grows up in today’s divorce culture has been given the unconscious permission to have an affair and divorce. One of the best ways not to have sex with someone else’s spouse is to have sex with your own spouse. Sex is the protecting shield that guards a man or women’s heart from being stolen by someone who wants to meet the needs of your spouse when you do not. I heard at a marriage conference, “If you don’t date want to date your spouse, there are many who do." It is going to take couples who are willing to look out for the best interest of the present and future generations, not themselves to turn the tide and leave a Godly marriage legacy.

In conclusion, if sex finds its way back in the master bedroom and off the TV screens, Americans will experience a revolution in their homes and churches. The American Top Idol can only be worshipped if broken marriages produce broken families that in turn release broken children with no purpose to marry broken spouses. Our problem is systemic. It begins with married couples. Dad’s and mom’s who tear down the sex idol at home will create an environment conducive for their children to later marry well. Premarital sex can destroy a future marriage like no bodies business, but children who marry, according to God’s plan and purposes will experience sex in the creative order, not before but after marriage. These children, who have married well, will have children who marry well and on and on it goes. If families take the initiative to meet, their children’s need of security, then the boy down the street or girl up the block will not have a chance and the advertising agencies, which thrive on the principle, sex sells, will not be able to sell the sex idol, because it has been torn down!